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The few times I flew with my mother, I discovered she was not the best passenger on earth. If there was a little kid behind her, kicking her seat, she’d wait and wait and wait, slowly getting to the boiling point, and then she’d explode.

“Will you please stop kicking my seat?!?!?!”

Oh, what a joy. Yeah, as a teenager, when the last thing you ever want is for your parent to draw attention? Well, I just wanted to sink into a hole.

Unfortunately, little kids still kick the seat in front of them. Hopefully, most of us handle it better than my mother did.

Not long ago, a Redditor known as Striking-Factor5289 was on a flight with their own seat kicker. Usually the “kicker” is a kid, like the ones my mother inappropriately dealt with. Unfortunately, this kicker wasn’t a child; it was a guy in his mid-20s. So Striking-Factor planned some revenge.

We’ve posted a few other stories about, well, “revenge on a plane” in the past:

• Woman’s creative revenge when passenger wouldn’t switch seats
• Cardi B.’s revenge on fellow passenger on her Delta flight
• Flight attendant’s revenge on “fake vegetarian” on flight

But I think Striking-Factor5289 may have beat them all ;-).

Here’s their story, as told in Reddit’s “Petty Revenge” subreddit (this is the original link. Heads up that it may include adult language that’s NSFW):

Here are some of the replies to the post, from Striking-Factor5289’s fellow Redditors:

• Brilliant. Bravo. My only nitpick was why not the ENTIRE bottle? — geepy67 (OP’s reply: In case I get thirsty 🙂 )
• When OP is skilled enough at writing to get the whole story across in a succinct paragraph or so is incredibly rare. I’m used to paragraphs and paragraphs of ridiculous adjectives and irrelevant details. Refreshing, indeed! — potatohats (This comment was followed by dozens upon dozens of replies that focused on recipes that go on for paragraphs before you get to the actual recipe. i.e. “You don’t enjoy reading the novel explaining, in extreme detail, the origin of the recipe, how the author and their family make it every <insert holiday here>, what they serve it with, and how special and delicious it is? /s” LOL!)
• Someone kept kicking my wife’s seat. They would stop and start back up after me and the flight attendant told them to stop. Remembered I had some extra zip-ties for the luggage tags and noticed they had a small carry-on under my seat. So I quickly zip-tied one of the handles to the chair leg. Hearing their confusion and anger when we landed was pure ASMR. — soydemexico
• Poor poor MacBook Pro. — conditerite
• Flying pro tip. I always choose the seats in front of the emergency row. It’s the same standard price as the rest of the plane but the row behind you gets twice the leg room so they will never kick the back of your seat. — chairUrchin (someone did reply to this that they would get no recline in their seat with this plan)
• You are a prime example of not all heroes wear capes. — gxxrdrvr
• You would do this when you don’t have to wait at the baggage carousel. Exit the plane and dip out into a car — CoolTomatoh
• My sister had a seat kicker on an international flight,so she saved the butter packs from her and her husband’s meals and rubbed them into the seat kicker’s very nice coat, which was stowed safely under my sister’s seat. — Sad_Syllabub_7612
• Had you used a little bottle of whiskey, that lingering odor would’ve REALLY messed up his day. — LipFight

Our take on it

Petty? You bet. Somehow satisfying? Absolutely.

Would I ever do it? Nah; I’m a weenie.

But it’s something I’d daydream about doing, LOL!

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This post first appeared on Your Mileage May Vary