Call me a Pollyanna, but I’ve always held the belief that most adults, deep down inside, are decent people. Granted, some are probably “great” people while others are just “good” ones (and, don’t get me wrong; I fully realize there are some a-holes in the mix). But still more positives than negatives, overall. So when people are on a plane, some will often try to be helpful to the flight attendants.
Unfortunately, despite good intentions, not everyone’s “helpful” gestures are actually helpful. Sometimes, people’s attempts at “helping” can miss their mark and can actually be annoying, potentially dangerous, or make more work for flight attendants. Here are some examples:
Organizing the overhead compartments
Ever since airlines started charging for checked items, people try to bring as much carry-on/personal bags as they can get away with. That tends to fill the overhead compartments quickly.
On top of that, despite announcement after announcement, some people (remember those a-holes I was talking about?) still put smaller items in the overhead; which takes up even more precious space.
Some do-gooders will try rearranging the overhead compartments, organizing them Tetris-style, so there’s still as much empty space up there as possible. They might even be so bold as to move a bag from one overhead to another to make available space more functional.
Don’t do that.
People don’t like when others touch their stuff; it’s intrusive. (Some don’t even like when flight attendants touch their stuff, but at least FAs have the authority to do so. You don’t.) And to move a bag from one bin to another? It’s not a great feeling when the person looking for their bag realizes it isn’t there.
Put your bag up there and leave the rest alone. Or if moving a bag is the only way your bag can fit, ask, “Who has the red backpack?” Once you know who it belongs to, ask them if it’s OK to move it over so there can be enough room for your bag. If no one claims to be the owner of the red backpack, ask the flight attendant to intervene.
Not telling them you’re scared of flying
Some people don’t want to be a burden, a worry, a pain, a bother, you name it. So they may be scared of flying and not tell anyone. Meanwhile, they sit in their seat, terrified.
Don’t do that.
Flight attendants know a bunch of ways to help nervous passengers calm down. Let them help you so you’re not miserable.
Calling flight attendants by terms of endearment
There are plenty of affectionate terms some folks call people. Honey. Sweetheart. Darling. Dear. Sweetpea. Babe. Sweetie.
Don’t do that. Not to a flight attendant.
At best, using terms of endearment can be considered patronizing. At worst, it can be ground for sexual harassment. Save it for your loved ones who are OK with those names. Calling the FA “Sir” and “Ma’am” are just fine. They can get the FA’s attention but are still respectful.
Tugging at the FA’s sleeve to get their attention
Some people might think it’s rude to call out to get the flight attendant’s attention. Or they make not want to wake up the person(s) nearby who are sleeping. So, they’ll tug on the flight attendant’s sleeve.
Don’t do that.
Remember when we were talking about being intrusive? Touching someone to get their attention is also intrusive.
If they’re nearby, say, “Excuse me.” Otherwise, use the call button.
Enforcing the rules for other passengers
Fight on planes have decreased significantly since the years of Covid. That doesn’t mean they still don’t happen.
Remember that being stuck in an uncomfortable tin can for hours on end can make anyone grumpy. Also remember that you, as a passenger, are not any person of authority. Enforcing the rules on your fellow passengers (i.e., “Hey, take that red backpack of yours and put it under the seat in front of you.” “It’s no big deal to switch seats with that lady; go ahead and do it.” [the latter happened to us once, years ago]) miiiight get them to do as you say. Or it might earn you a punch in the nose.
Stay out of it, mind your business, and let the flight attendants force the rules.
Throwing away someone else’s trash
Someone in the window seat might be OK with your taking their trash from their hands, to save everyone the awkwardness of overreaching. But don’t just take a stranger’s trash from their tray and toss it.
Someone may have something important under that used napkin. If, in your attempt to be helpful, you inadvertently throw away something valuable – say, earbuds, a ring they took off to put lotion on their hands, etc. – the FA will now have to fish through the trash to retrieve it.
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