My 11 Travel Superpowers (I’m Not The Only One, Am I?)

by SharonKurheg
When Joe and I travel, the same odd sort of things tend to happen over and over. I’m not talking about this particular oddball thing that happens when I’m on vacation – that’s just a weird coincidence. I mean real-life stuff.
Some are, I admit, 100% under my control. Others are most certainly not. I like to refer to them as my “travel superpowers.”
Do any of these types of things happen to you?

Parking in the furthest 1/4 of a row

If we’re going somewhere with a regular parking lot, like a strip mall or restaurant, I tend to have relatively decent luck with getting a parking spot that’s relatively close to our destination. But if we’re going to a place where you are guided where to park, say at a theme park? Guaranteed we’d be in the furthest 1/4 of the row. Doesn’t matter if we’re in our own car, someone else’s car or a rental – it WILL happen.

Room assignments

In my earlier years of traveling, when the hotel people would figure out room assignments (here’s how they do it), I’m pretty sure they saw my name and automatically put me near the elevator, ice machine, or ALLLLLLL the way at the end of the hall (so I’d have to carry my bags that much further).

This admittedly doesn’t happen quite as often, because we have status with some hotel brands, and that tends to help the room assignment situation.

Sitting next to a manspreader on the plane

When I’m on a plane, unless I’m in the aisle or window seat and Joe is in the middle seat, I will invariably have a manspreader next to me. Maybe they see how short I am (I’m 4’6″) and figure I don’t need all the room? I dunno.

I’ve figured out a way to stop manspreaders in 3 easy steps (here’s how to do it), but still…EVERY. Flippin’. Time.

Package deliveries

Joe and I have been traveling for a long time, so we know all the ins and outs of how to stop the mail, UPS, Fed Ex and Amazon deliveries (here’s how to do it).

However, sometimes you’ll order something and you just don’t know when it will arrive. We get some shipments of wine a few times a year and the guy who picks them out for us mails them “when the weather is cool enough.” Or some stuff on Amazon will be delivered “Between Nov. 8th and December 12th.”

Invariably, when we’re out of town, THAT’S when “that stuff” is delivered.

Our neighbors are awesome at picking up stuff from our porch and holding it for us. And if it’s a UPS package that has to be signed for (like that wine I mentioned), you can pay for them to hold the package at The UPS Store or some similar place, until you can come and pick it up. So we’ve gotten stuck with doing that here and there.

But yeah, if we’re not home and everything is “stopped?” Something will still be delivered. I guarantee it.

The fruit-infused water disappears

In the past few years, many hotels will have a dispenser with ice water and some sort of fruit(s) in it…citrus, strawberries, cucumbers, etc. It’s usually in the front lobby, but sometimes at the bar.

Anyway, I love the stuff. I would fill my entire Camelback with it, if I didn’t think I was being too greedy. I don’t though; when we check in, I just fill up the little plastic cups they have next to the dispenser.

I would fill up more little plastic cups during our trip, but I can’t. Invariably, after that first day, the infused water disappears, never to be seen again for the rest of my visit. It’s crazy how consistently it happens. Sorta like, “Oh, Sharon’s checked in; time to stop putting the water out until she leaves.”

The prejudice against “Yellow Stuff”

I rarely add regular sugar to things; I’m an artificial sweetener kind of woman. Splenda (Sucralose, a.k.a. “Yellow Stuff”) is my sweetener of choice and I’ll use Equal (Aspartame, a.k.a. “Blue Stuff”) in a pinch. But I’m very much not a fan of Sweet’n Low (Saccharin, a.k.a. “Pink Stuff”).

If we’re traveling, chances are good that no place will have Yellow Stuff. They MAY have Blue Stuff. But more often than not, especially if they only offer one artificial sweetener, it’ll be that nasty ol’ Pink Stuff.

I just bring a snack bag of my own packets of Yellow Stuff nowadays.

Car? Nap.

Thanks to COVID, Joe and I have done a lot of road trips in the past year and change. We tend to take his car because it gets better mileage. And since it’s his car and the seat and mirrors are already set up for him, he winds up doing a whole lot of the driving.

And me? If I’m the passenger, I fall asleep. Doesn’t matter if I’ve had a full night’s sleep the night before or not. I might nap for 2 hours, or it might be for just 20 minutes. But I will definitely fall asleep in that passenger seat.

My kingdom for a Tide pen

Y’all, we have 80 bajillion Tide pens at home. They’re in our junk drawer, our computer desks, in the laundry room, you name it. If we get a stain on a shirt, we are READY, with multiple Tide pens in hand.

When we’re on vacation though? Not a Tide pen to be seen. And so I buy another one at Walgreens or CVS or whatever, so whatever we dropped on our shirt hopefully won’t permanently stain it.

And then I bring it home and throw it in the junk drawer. You know, so we can start the whole process all over again. #rolleyes

My kingdom for a bottle of hand sanitizer

I worked in health care for over 2 decades so I was carrying little bottles of hand sanitizer in my pocket for years before it was “COVID cool.” But since COVID, I make sure I always have a few extras.

When I go on vacation, I want to make sure that I have enough little bottles, so I throw them into my travel bag. And then, when I get home, I don’t take them out. And then I have to buy more little bottles of hand sanitizer because I can’t find the ones I just bought.

That’s because they’re still all in my travel bag. #rolleyesagain

Why I bring an umbrella

I always bring an umbrella when I travel. Even if there is absolutely no chance of rain whatsoever. Because if I don’t bring it, I guarantee it will rain. Always happens.

I should make a map of our hotel

Y’all, I have a good sense of direction. A REALLY good one. So why is it that when I’m staying in a hotel, I ALWAYS go the wrong way? If I leave our hotel room and the elevator is to the right, I always go to the left. If I leave the elevator and our hotel room is to the left, I always – ALWAYS – go to the right.

It’s embarrassing, LOLOL!

So those are my travel superpowers…tag, you’re “it”…what are yours?

Feature Photo: Pixabay

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