I always assumed my online privacy had value — not priceless, but at least worth more than “loose change found in couch cushions.” After all, Facebook tracked everything: the photos I posted, the people I unfriended, the places I checked in, even which Hogwarts house I got sorted into. But today, thanks to a class action settlement, I finally learned the real dollar amount of my digital life.
According to the Facebook Consumer Privacy Settlement:
Numerous lawsuits were brought on behalf of Facebook users who allege that Facebook (now Meta Platforms, Inc.) shared or otherwise made accessible to third parties — including app developers, “whitelisted” parties, business partners, advertisers, and data brokers — user data and data about users’ friends without permission. The Court did not decide in favor of Plaintiffs or Defendant. Defendant denies all claims. Both sides agreed to a Settlement to avoid the cost and risk of a trial.
I Finally Know What My Online Privacy Is Worth
Today I received the email:
You have received a Virtual Prepaid Mastercard® in the amount of $34.69 as your Facebook Consumer Privacy Settlement payment.
Yes. After 15 years of Facebook knowing more about me than my doctor, I’ve officially been compensated.
- All those ads stalking me across the internet
- All those “people you may know” recommendations from someone I met once at a college.
- Every quiz that told me which Hogwarts house I was in (unashamedly Ravenclaw)
All of that intense data extraction and third-party access — worth a grand total of:
💸 $34.69 💸
Which is somehow:
- Less than an upgrade to Delta Comfort+
- Less than a checked bag
Honestly, I’m not mad they shared my data. I’m offended at the pricing.
Final Thought
After years of being followed, tracked, profiled, categorized, and sold to, Facebook has finally revealed my worth: $34.69. I always assumed my privacy wasn’t priceless — I just didn’t realize it was on clearance.
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